The Gym

Recently I've been going to the gym a lot and with every visit I've been getting increasingly angrier at the type of scum who inhabit the place, so felt it relevant to blog about my annoyances of the gym.
First off, I hate about 90%+ of the guys who attend the gym. Notice I used the word attend as opposed to the word use, there is a difference. As most guys in the gym don't use it in the way of getting maximum benefit of keeping themselves fit through the various equipment provided by the gym. Instead they have certain rituals which normal people wishing to use the gym find all too irritating.

They seem to conjugate in the changing rooms for hours walking about naked and talking about that football game which you very much doubt they ever partook in as it would involve them exiting their haven of bullshit talk and nudity and doing some actual exercise. The swimming changing rooms being worse as you actually do wish to use the hairdryer which is unfortunately perpetually glued to some pretentious jock's balls !

Eventually when they emerge from their prolonged act of 'getting ready', they all have the same fucking routine ! Yes, around 90% of guys in the gym follow the exact same routine when it comes to exercise: Leave the changing room and walk to the select few machines which concentrate on working your biceps (and sometimes stomach) then totally putting themselves through pain by calibrating the machines with far more mass than they can handle and then overworking their arms just so as they can maintain their out of proportion massive show-offy biceps and forced 6 pack all accountable to overweighted pain and protein shakes. Totally contrasting with the rest of their unworked bodies.

Now I'm not exactly one to talk about muscular build or anything, being rather skinny myself, however I do work out my whole body when I do go to the gym. I'd rather try to improve my fitness in general as opposed to build a certain muscle or two to add to some stupid conceited image. And when I do go and try to exercise, I always have that overhanging feeling of intimidation which seems to pervade the minds of not so...prickish people?
I've worked out an effective way of avoiding gym wankers, and it's rather simple. Just do your normal exercise away from any mirrors. I've noticed that these twats when doing weights, as always to enlarge the biceps, seem to look at themselves in the mirror when doing so ! So by being avoidant of mirrors, you can escape the frame of intimidation and actually get on with your workout in peace !

I believe there should exist two separate gyms, for normal people and for show-off pricks. Imagine, if all gym wankers had a separate gym, preferably Auschwitz or something. And then normal gyms only consisted of normal people doing normal exercise ?!

However there is another form of intimidation within the gym. You know that feeling when you step up on the crosstrainer and start to run and just think "I can't do my full half hour today! I really really can't!" It happens every so often that you just don't have it in you to do anything, so you think, "ah 15 minutes and that's me!" Then at 14 minutes in, when you're on that glorious home run, 14 fucking minutes ! Some girl comes to the cross trainer next to you. A girl. A pretty wee girl who by stereotype should be far less adequate than you and starts pounding that machine !
So obviously it's the natural masculine need to prove himself which makes you think "fuck, i need to finish now!" We're all so scared of being shown up by woman within the gym ! That familiar constant glance over to their machine to see how well they're doing while constantly increasing your challenge and sweating like a bitch over yours !

I'm sorry, there's nothing attractive about a woman who pounds weights or sprints that treadmill faster than you can.

Anyway, I'll keep this short and contain my rant to the above points only :)